Monthly Archives: September 2006

Musharraf the buffoon


For the past few days, it has become a regular feature of my day to go through the daily coverage of Musharraf’s book. Every day, a new bombshell is dropped. Makes for very good reading. People may update themselves with the latest on-goings here- http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/specialcoverage/2029561.cms

I seriously cannot understand how a self-respecting army man can come to this. Politicians are known for it, but not a soldier. He’s becoming the laughing stock of the world. And still he keeps on making appearances on American TV channels to plug his book. But looking at the history of past dictators, one shouldn’t be so surprised. They all suffer from self delusion, and the effect just keeps on increasing the more they stay atop their throne.

Mr Bush…you have some serious competetion now.

Obnoxious pool fun

*Stand on top of the high board and say you won’t come down until your demands are met.

*Tell the lifeguards that they aren’t doing their jobs because you have seen at least 15 people drown today.

*Ask people if they have seen your pet shark.

*Sit in the baby pool and play with the toys.

*Take a flutter board and pretend you can’t swim.

*Hit strangers with your flutter board.

*Ask an attractive lifeguard to practise CPR on you.

*Sit in front of a water jet, make moaning sounds and say, ”Oh yeah… oooh that feels soooo good….”

*Sit on the top of the water slide and don’t move.

*Swim near a stranger and go ”Dammit I knew I shouldn’t have had watermelon before I came here.”

*Insist that you saw a monster at the bottom of the pool.

*Pretend to drown and then when someone tries to help you, say ”HA-HA, fooled you!”
*Scream as someone is trying to do something when jumping off of a diving board.
*Laugh at fat people in swimsuits.

*Tell people you saw the lifeguard pissing in the pool.

*Ask a lifeguard if skinny-dipping is allowed.

*Try to negotiate the price of getting in.

*Take a really long time when you are on top of the high dive and then act as though you were pushed off.

*When in line, ask strangers if they think invisble people get a discount.

*Take your towel, tie it around your shoulders and say ”Wheee! I’m Batman!” while running around.

*Hit strangers with your wet towel.

*Throw people’s things into the pool.

*Sing and dance on top of the dinving board, then do a belly-flop as your grande-finale. *Play Marco-Polo by yourself.

*Ask small children if they have seen any suspicious-looking sea monsters lately.

Hyderabad trip

I and Shantanu reached Hyderabad about 10am. An old friend picked us up and took us to his place. I was meeting him after over two years. As I found out later, he too had turned entrepreneur. He’s running some educational and counseling services helping students who want to study abroad. It hasn’t been a year yet…and he’s close to getting on top:). Anyways…we chatted about our businesses, and how we could collaborate. Reached the client’s office a little early, and ate a rather heavy chinese meal at a nearby restaurant. Boy…they serve enough in each single serving for 2 people! But ofcourse…I do eat a lot…and I hadn’t eaten anything since the morning, so didn’t leave much:D.

The meeting began at 2 o’clock. Mr Murthy, my contact person in the company took us to the conference room, where I setup the equipment and began the presentation. People kept dropping in, we ended up meeting four of their seniormost staff. And the youngest one of them was in his mid 30’s! A round of Q & A’s followed, and it went quite well. We presented them with a copy of the agreement prepared by my lawyer, and they kept it for later review.

They have a pretty large office and good headcount, but they don’t have experts in the web applications domain. And they keep getting a lot projects in that field. So instead of hiring people on their own, they want to have a long term agreement with us, where they keep subcontracting us with work. They are present in seven countries currently, and most of their clients are abroad. That works out quite well…as they pay better as well:)

My friend’s workplace was near the place of departure, so went to see him in the evening. Boy…the place looked good! Apparently, the whole place was setup by some other guy, who wasn’t able to manage the business, so he handed the reins to my friend. We had a long discussion about Hyderabad food, where I stood as a mute spectator as most of the local delicacies are not made from ghaas-phoos:D. Still…there was atleast one dessert, Quwani ka meetha, a Hyderabad speciality, which is composed of fruit. He ordered some for us…and we had it there.Really sweet and delectable. And as usual, I dropped some on my clothes:p. Always manage to do that…lol. Finally said the goodbye’s around 9, and started on our trip back home.

If things work out as hoped, I’m gonna be setting up a place of my own soon (Working from home is so much better!).There are already offers of work from US and Australia, apart from the Hyderabad guys. And will have to increase headcount…which is the toughest part. Even with so many software people available, its always hard to find people who you can fit into your setup. Otherwise you end up spending a lot of time in training, and then correcting their errors. And when things are set…they get a better offer and they quit! Went through this ordeal while managing the startup I’d been in for over a year. If anyone gets to know of available talent, please contact me.

24 fun things to do in the elevator

1. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: “Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!”

2. Whistle the first seven notes of “It’s a Small World” incessantly.

3. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: “Got enough air in there?”

4. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.

5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

7. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

8. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go “plink” at the bottom.

9. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: “I’ve got new socks on!”

10. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: “Oh, no, not now, damn motion sickness!”

11. Meow occasionally.

12. Holler “Chutes away!” whenever the elevator descends.

13. Walk on with a cooler that says “human head” on the side.

14. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce “You’re one of THEM!” and move to the far corner of the elevator.

15. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers “through” it.

16. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask “is that your beeper?”

17. Say “Ding!” at each floor.

18. Say “I wonder what all these do” and push the red buttons.

19. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

20. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your “personal space.”

21. Announce in a demonic voice: “I must find a more suitable host body.”

22. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

23. Wear “X-Ray Specs” and leer suggestively at other passengers.

24. Stop at every floor, run off the elevator, then run back on.

Untitled

Is it good to be bad
And bad to be good
With those who make you sad
Just drive you mad

You fight with the world
Go against good sense
They utter a woeful word
And you get all tense

They say war, you say peace
You yourself lose, and let them win
But that one time, you cry farce
They do no bad, and you mortal sin

They break, you fix
Slowly you realise, the never ending tricks
You gather strength, and take the decision
And end it all, with a painful incision

Some things are made unbreakable
While others are born brittle
The more you try to prevent severance
The sooner it tends to fall apart

You grow wiser, forgive and forget
They weren’t bad always, nor you always right
It is but human, to commit mistake
Keep on learning, with each one you make

Life online

I have been quite lucky to meet interesting people online, and on some occasions, luckier still as I’ve been able to meet them in real:)

A few months back, this girl Ruth buzzed me on one of my anonymous profiles on yahoo. We became good friends instantly (I’m quite good at that:D). Then she told me about the work she did. She works for a UN agency, based in Geneva. Her work is to manage UN sponsored humanitarian projects across North Africa, Middle East and Central Asia. When we first talked, she was on one such project in Libya. Told me about the situation there, and how the UN projects work. Lots of interesting stuff. We chatted for about a week, and then I didn’t see her again.

Today, I found her online again, after a long time. Lately she’s been on projects in Libya, Syria, Lebanon, Egypt, Bosnia, Armenia, Azerbaijan, Georgia, and Southern Russia (Daguestan, Ingushetia, Ossetia, Chechnya). Phew! She travels a lot!

We discussed a little about Southern Russia, her most recent trip. She told me that these are all independent nations, but apparently mother Russia doesn’t want to le go of them. Even despite my good knowledge of geography, I myself hadn’t heard of Ingushetia and Ossetia, and told her the same. Then she told me that Beslan (site of school massacre by Chechen rebels), is actually a part of Ossetia. If one tries to recall the incident, everywhere media quoted Beslan as a Russian city.

Anyways…we talked more, and she told me about her ex boy friend…who’s from Spetsnaz! For the uninitiated, Spetsnaz is the name given to the well known Russian special forces. Its equivalent to the SAS (Special Air Services) in Britain, the Delta Force in USA, and the NSG (National Security Guard, better known as the Black Cats) in our very own India. I’m a big fan of Forsyth/Ludlum, and the spy thriller genre, and was amazed to find out someone who’s actually known a real person from that world. And then she told me how he’s obsessed with her, and doesn’t let go of her. He always manages to find her. Ofcourse…its his profession to find people in hiding:P. She told me how the same people she tries to save in Southern Russia, are shot down by her boy friend and his friends. Talk of clashing professions!

And then, there was some innocent flirtation;).
I hope the Spetsnaz guy doesnt get to know about it:P…or I’m dead meat!

Movies with me

This is the list of movies I have with me as of now:

English:

Godfather Trilogy
Monty python and the holy grail
Monty python and the life of brian
American History X
Lock stock and two smoking barrels
Trainspotting
Waiting…
40 year old virgin
Batman begins
Passion of the christ
Harold and Kumar go to Whitecastle
Cars
Bowling for Columbine (Micheal Moore’s documentary on American Gun Culture)
Requiem for a dream
Secretary
Butterfly Effect
Wedding Crashers
Star Wars complete episodes 1-6
Harry Potter and the Goblet Of Fire
Chronicles of Narnia
Se7en
Dukes of Hazzard
Weatherman
Date movie
Munich
Pink Panther
Firewall
When a stranger calls
Dreamers
Underworld evolution
Conspiracy theory
Layer Cake
Memento
Fight Club
Notting Hill
Pi
Collateral- doucmentary
Jackass the movie
The Punisher
Dirty Dancing- Havana Nights
Lord of the rings- trilogy
Italian job
Alfie
Austin Powers- International Man of Mystery
Signs
The breakfast club
White Chicks
Monster House
Pirates of silicon valley
Severance
The Illusionist
Irreversible
Alexander
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
Police Academy- Entire series(1-7)

Hindi

Kabhi alvida na kehna
Sarkar
D
Company
Fanaa
Rang De Basanti
Dil Chahta Hai

More movies added every week

21 things to remember

Sounds like your typical forwarded mail. But there is a lot of wisdom in these.

1. No one can ruin your day without YOUR permission.
2. Most people will be about as happy, as they decide to be.
3. Others can stop you temporarily, but only you can do it permanently.
4. Whatever you are willing to put up with, is exactly what you will have.
5. Success stops when you do.
6. When your ship comes in…. make sure you are willing to unload it.
7. You will never have it all together.
8. Life is a journey…not a destination. Enjoy the trip!
9. The biggest lie on the planet When I get what I want I will be happy.
10. The best way to escape your problem is to solve it.
11. I’ve learned that ultimately , ‘takers’ lose and ‘givers’ win.
12. Life’s precious moments don’t have value, unless they are shared.
13. If you don’t start, it’s certain you won’t arrive.
14. We often fear the thing we want the most.
15. He or she who laughs……lasts.
16. Yesterday was the deadline for all complaints.
17. Look for opportunities…not guarantees.
18. Life is what’s coming….not what was.
19. Success is getting up one more time.
20. Now is the most interesting time of all.
21. When things go wrong…..don’t go with them.